Friday, July 4, 2014

Marriage Advice From Your Local Expert On Being Single

Ok, I'll admit it. I use catchy titles to make people read my blog! The marriage advice will most definitely NOT be coming from me today!

But it will be coming... just remember that patience is a virtue.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints puts a strong emphasis on family and strengthening family relationships. In 1995 the prophet came out with a proclamation on the importance of families, the first paragraph reads:

WE, THE FIRST PRESIDENCY and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

(Read the entire proclamation here.)

Families are central to God's plan for us! That's why they're so important!

But, as we know, God's plan for us doesn't end after this life. So naturally, neither do families! Another paragraph of the Family Proclamation reads:

"The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally."

In temples we can be sealed for time and all eternity, meaning there is no "till death do you part!" We can literally be with our families forever!

Now your patience shall be rewarded: I'm going to talk about some of the advice that I've gotten for that distant future where I will be sealed to someone in the temple and start my own forever family.

On my mission I've met a lot of families. Like A LOT. And they've all been different! No two families are alike! I'm fairly convinced that the reason I was sent to Mesa on my mission was to have HUNDREDS of examples of how/who/what I need to be when I go home!

I've seen lots of different kinds of marriages and lots of different kinds of parenting techniques. I've slowly gone from thinking in my head "wow, cutest family ever, I wonder how they do it" to actually asking them "Ok, I need your help, how do you make your family so awesome?"

So I've been asking them! And I want to share some of the advice I've gotten with the world! I'll be adding my own personal comments in pink, because I'm obviously an expert that has a lot to say on this subject.

Communication is key, don't be afraid to ask your spouse to do things for you, compromise, talk about big decisions and purchases beforehand, you're allowed to take a few minutes to cool down before telling your spouse what is bothering you, be HONEST.
This is a collection of what many many people told me. Apparently good communication is kind of important! 

Don't fret the little things, don't worry if they don't load the dishwasher the same way as you, don't take anything personally, there are plenty of things that will happen that won't be worth fighting over, LET IT GO.
Love this! When two people get married they are trying to mesh together two very different lives, it makes sense that it won't fit together like a perfect puzzle piece at first. Being adaptable and teachable will make for a much easier time combining two different life styles.

Hold hands, always sleep in the same bed even when you're angry, always always always always always APOLOGIZE!
I can't add anything to this, it's too perfect. BIG thank you to those who gave me this advice!

Attend the temple often together, put God before your own desires, stay active in the gospel together, SERVE TOGETHER.
A marriage should be a triangle, it should be you, your spouse, and Heavenly Father. With all three of you working together you accomplish everything and get through anything!

Last but not least, don't feel like you're settling, go into a marriage as an equal partnership.
If I'm going to spend eternity with someone, it's gonna have to be a good match. For lack of better words, to marry a TEN I'm gonna have to be a TEN. 

So there you have the highlights of my collection of marriage advice. I'm hoping someday I get to put some of this advice into practice :)

I know that I can be with my family forever, both my family I have now and my future family. I know that temples are houses of the Lord and in them we can be sealed for time and eternity.

This is from that one time I graduated high school, glad I get to spend eternity with these peeps!

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